September 1st's Joke of the Week

What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?  

A carrot.

August 17th's Joke of the Week

What does a clock do when it’s hungry?

It goes back four seconds.

August 10th's Joke of the Week

What kind of tree fits in your hand?

A palm tree.

August 3rd's Joke of the Week

How did one tectonic plate apologize to the other?

“My fault.”

July 27th's Joke of the Week

Have you heard the rumor about butter? Never mind, I shouldn't spread it.

July 20th's Joke of the Week

My grandmother reached 100 yesterday!  That's the last time I get in the car with her when she's late for bingo.

July 6th's Joke of the Week

Why do restaurants on the moon get such bad reviews? No atmosphere.

June 29th's Joke of the Week

Luke and Obi-Wan are in a Chinese restaurant having a meal. Skillfully using his chopsticks, Obi-Wan deftly dishes a large portion of noodles into his bowl and tops it with some chicken and cashew nuts.  All this is done with the consummate ease you’d expect from a Jedi Master. Meanwhile, Luke is using his chopsticks in both hands, dropping food all over. Obi-Wan looks at Luke disapprovingly and say, “Use the forks, Luke.”

June 22nd's Joke of the Week

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.

June 15th's Joke of the Week

I wondered why that Frisbee kept getting bigger.  Then it hit me.

June 11th's Pun-Official Holiday

Have an a-maize-ing time today.  It’s Corn on the Cob Day.

June 1st's Joke of the Week

The roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference.  He acquired his girth from too much pi.

May 18th's Joke of the Week

What happens when you throw books into the ocean?

You get a title wave.

May the 4th's Joke of the Week

Someone ripped the 5th month out of my new calendar.

I’m dismayed

April 27th's Joke of the Week

The bartender says, "We don't serve time travelers here."  A time traveler walks into a bar.

April 13th's Joke of the Week

I quickly covered myself with my arms as my bookcase fell on me.

My fast thinking was due to the shelf defense class I took.

Easter Sunday's Joke of the Week

Why did the Easter Bunny have a panic attack?

He was having an egg-sistential crisis.

March 30th's Joke of the Week

Why are zebras bad at baseball?  

Three stripes and they're out!

March 24th's Joke of the Week

Why did the turtle break up with the giraffe?  They never saw eye to eye.

March 14th's Pun of the Week

I pirated a movie yesterday...

I gave it 3.14 stars.