Sunday, February 11, 2018

Latest Update

Just a quick update on my health.  I am slowly healing up.  I’m doing a little better every day, but healing up from major surgery like I had takes some time.  Fortunately, I am still off work for another week.  Not that I want to go back to work next Monday.  Having all this time off has been nice, especially with the Olympics on.  (You might have figured out I enjoy watching them.)

My oncologist agreed that I don’t need any chemo or radiation, which is huge.  I’m going to have an MRI in 3 months and another CT scan in six months to make sure they don’t see anything else.  And they are still doing some testing to see if they can figure out what caused it in the first place.  But I’m concentrating on healing up and putting this behind me.

After all, I’ve got two mud runs to do in June.

Friday, January 26, 2018

Home from the Hospital

There were no further delays, and I had my surgery on Monday.  The surgeon is quite happy with how it went and how quickly I seem to be recovering.

I am home from the hospital – I came home yesterday in fact.  I’m still very sore and taking pain meds, which isn’t a super surprise.  My brother was down for a couple of days, and my parents are still here taking care of me.  I am just taking it very slowly, trying not to leave my recliner too much since I am comfortable in it.

But I got the best news yesterday right before I left.  The pathology report had just come back, and the results are great.  It was stage 1 cancer, and they got it all out – nothing in the lymph nodes or anything.  The surgeon said I was cancer free, in fact.

So now, I need to heal up, which will be a slow process, but then I can put this all behind me.

Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Surgery Scheduled

Yesterday, I had an appointment with my oncologist. The MRI wasn’t as conclusive as he hoped, but he still doesn’t think the cancer has spread to my liver. So we have rescheduled my surgery for Monday morning. It can’t come soon enough.

Tuesday, January 09, 2018

Roller Coaster

The last few days have been a roller coaster of emotion.

Last Thursday, I had the CT scan.  Friday, I got the results – they found 5 legions in my liver that they thought were probably cancer.  As a result, they canceled my surgery for Wednesday, and wanted to have me do an MRI and a liver biopsy to make sure.  If it was cancer, then they would be giving me chemo to shrink the tumors before I had surgery.

Naturally, the news hit me hard.

My parents came down Saturday to be a support, which meant scrambling to clean out the spare room since my ceiling was finally fixed.  We spent time Saturday night when they arrived and Sunday afternoon doing that and getting them situated.  Dad has already started fixing the issues with the master bathroom, which is wonderful.  The only thing that’s been working is the shower.  And it means they got to be at church on Sunday when the elders prayed for me, which meant a lot of all of us.

However, at 4:30 Monday, my oncologist called again.  In comparing the CT scan from last week to the ones I had in 2006, they noticed two of the legions are in the same place and the same size.  Now they are thinking that this may be something that happens in livers with blood vessels.  Unrelated to the cancer completely.

As a result, they don’t want to do a biopsy, but they think the MRI will be enough to tell what they are dealing with for sure in my liver.  I have that schedules for Thursday afternoon.

Yes, I’m still bummed that the surgery isn’t happening as planned since I was ready to start dealing with the cancer.  But I’m also so relieved with the most recent news.  I’m trying to tell myself not to get too excited in case they go back to deciding I do have cancer in my liver, but the rest of me is drowning out that part of my brain.

Meanwhile, we are praising God for the Monday afternoon news and praying that the MRI Thursday will confirm it.

Wednesday, January 03, 2018

Plot Twist

Apparently, 2017 needed another plot twist.

On December 15th, I was diagnosed with colon cancer.  I still don’t have more specifics than that because the doctors don’t have more specifics than that.

I am scheduled for upper and lower CT scans tomorrow.  They will be looking for any signs of cancer anywhere else.

Assuming those come back clean and I stay healthy, I will be having surgery a week from today on 1/10.  They’ll be removing the tumor, a portion of my colon, and the lymph nodes around them to see if the cancer has spread to them.  I won’t have the results of that back from another couple of days.

Once the doctors know more, then I will know for sure what stage it is and what kind of treatment beyond surgery I will be facing.

What the doctors don’t know yet is they are on a deadline.  I’d already signed up for two mud runs in June, so I will be healthy enough to run them.  In all seriousness, I’m planning on beating this and getting back to my life quickly.

Along those lines, I would truly value your prayers.

I’ll keep you updated as I know more.

Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Insane Inflatable 5K – 2017

This last weekend was my last run of the year.  Okay, last paid for run; I still plan to run a couple of times a week around my condo.  It was the Insane Inflatable 5K, which was being held in Pasadena.

It was actually on the grounds of a country club.  I could tell that we were running on what used to be part of a course, but it didn’t look like it currently was in use.  It certainly wasn’t in use that day.  I suspect the course was actually 2.5 miles, but I have no way of clocking it.

As the name suggests, there was no mud or water.  Instead, it was made up of inflatable obstacles.  And it was a blast!  There were about 10 of them over the course.  It was pretty much climb up and slide down.  Sometimes, we had to climb through or go around something.  It was different, and a lot of fun.

I do think it could have been a little better thought out.  There were so signs pointing to the parking, which was about a quarter of a mile away from the start of the course.  I had no problem with the added walk (great warm up and cool down), but signs to let me know I was looking in the right place would have helped.  On the other hand, parking was free, which was wonderful.

The course was laid out with a series of yellow cones, but just on one side.  As long as you keep the cones to your left, you were okay.  It mostly worked, but it wasn’t the best way to lay out a course.  A couple of times while getting off an obstacle, it wasn’t obvious where to go next.

It seemed like a lot of people were walking this one, and there were some young kids on it.  I was one of the first to finish in my wave, which never ever happens.  And everyone was spread out, which is part of why marking both sides of the course would have been nice.

Still, it was a very fun run and I’d certainly sign up to do it again.

Monday, October 30, 2017

Survivor Mud Run 2017

Back in September, I did my last mud run of the year.  And possibly my last Survivor Mud Run.

For the second year in a row, this mud run has consisted of just mud pits.  Lots and lots of mud pits.  Now, don’t misunderstand, I do mud runs to get muddy.  Hello!  Otherwise, I’d just do regular runs.  However, I also enjoy the other obstacles.  And this one had some fun other obstacles.  I get why we can’t splash down into the lake any more, but we don’t have the web of cords to climb through or the tube to crawl through into the deep mud pit.

It’s very disappointing.  I get that digging mud pits and filling them with water is a lot of work, especially with the drought we’ve been having.  But you’d have less of that to do if there were fewer mud pits.  As much as climbing over things messes with my fear of heights even that is better than mud pit after mud pit after mud pit.

Last year, it was the same way, and I chalked it up to a fluke.  But two years in a row, and it makes me think this is the new normal.

If it were a local race, I’d probably still do it.  After all, I haven’t missed one since they started.  But with this being a 2 plus hour drive (depending on traffic) away, that’s a lot of time and gas for something that is disappointing.

Who knows.  I may change my mind next year.  But for now, I’m still leaning toward skipping it next year.

Monday, October 23, 2017

Fire

I grew up in Santa Rosa, the town most recently in the news for having been hit so hard by the fires in Northern California.

Of course, I didn’t have any idea of what was coming.  My phone battery was almost dead, so I turned it off on Sunday night, something I don’t do that often.

On Monday the 9th, I turned my phone on.  I had it checking e-mail, and I was looking at Facebook.  I saw some notifications that friends had marked themselves safe in a fire, but I wasn’t that concerned since those often don’t mean that these friends are really in any danger.

But then my phone connected enough to get the text from my sister-in-law.  “We are safe, you folks and my folks are safe.  But we think our house is gone.”  Yeah, that was a jolt to the system.

That’s when I started to realize just how big this entire thing really was.  My brother’s house was indeed burned in the fire, and my parents spent a week under mandatory evacuation.  Fortunately, their house was spared.

But my brother and his family were lucky to get out period.  The fire came up so fast that they didn’t have any warning.  My sister-in-law woke up smelling smoke.  She woke up my brother, they figured out what was going on, and got the kids.  They grabbed their computers and important papers, and left.  My brother stayed behind long enough to wake the neighbors.  That was all the time they had.

It’s been two weeks, and they are beginning to get things figured out.  Thanks to a family friend, they have a place to stay while their house is being rebuilt.  But they will have to replace everything they had.

Meanwhile, I’m still 400 miles away trying to wrap my head around this and figure out how I can help.  That week at work was brutal on top of everything going on with my family.

What has been wonderful is the outpouring of support.  My brother’s church is part of an organization of churches that sent a tractor trailer of stuff to help the members of the church who were affected as well as many others in the community.  I’ve had comments offering to help from authors and Trixie friends and my church who have never met my family.  It’s truly been wonderful.

But the rebuilding is going to take a very long time.

Tuesday, September 26, 2017

The Politics of Football

Yes, I’m chiming in on something sports related.  And something political.  But, being me, I’m doing it a couple of days late since the biggest arguments over this were over the weekend.  But I have thoughts swirling in my head that I need to get out.  Warning, this will be long and will go back a few years.

Normally, I don’t follow sports, but I have started to enjoy football.  I’ll take any football game, but it is more background noise; I have it on while doing other things and often even have the sound down.  I joined a fantasy football league with some friends, including several former roommates.

I blame this softening to my roommate Daniel.  He’s a huge football fan.  Back when he was my roommate, Tim Tebow was the quarterback for Florida.  (See, I couldn’t tell you which college or university in Florida it was.  I’m still not a diehard sports fan.)  It was his senior year, and he’d go on to win the Heisman Trophy.  Then he’d be drafted to the Denver Broncos as their backup quarterback.  When Peyton Manning got injured, Tebow managed to lead the team to some playoff victories before the team was eliminated.

However, Daniel, who was a fan of Tebow in college and a Broncos fan, didn’t think Tebow made a good NFL quarterback.

And then Tebow became controversial for kneeling.  After his team scored a touchdown, he’d briefly kneel on his own on the sidelines while the rest of the game was going on to give thanks to God.  The man had always been under scrutiny for being an outspoken Christian, and this just brought things to a boil.  There were calls for him to be fired.

Tebow was eventually traded and then cut from his new team.  However, Daniel’s perspective that Tebow was having a hard time making the transition to NFL quarterback kept playing in my mind.  Could the controversy surrounding him have helped with him losing his NFO job?  Sure.  But I submit that if he’d been winning games, he’d be a starting quarterback somewhere.

Fast forward a few years.  I join the fantasy football league with Daniel and some other friends.  Being the Northern California native I am, I snag Colin Kaepernick of the San Francisco 49ers as my quarterback.  And I didn’t win a game all year.  Now, I’m not blaming it all on him, but I had a front row seat to his performance as a quarterback.  He’s okay, but not all that great.  Lesson learned, I let auto draft help me in the future.

But I kept an eye on the 49ers as they continued to struggle.

Then Kaepernick started his protests last year.  It started with him sitting on the bench during the anthem, only kneeling when his lack of standing was called out.  And he became controversial.  And yet, he never became a great quarterback.

The calls for his firing started from some of the same people who had been defending Tebow.  And those who called for Tebow to be fired were defending Kaepernick.  And I watched the 49ers lose games under his leadership.

And here is where I feel sorry for the NFL as a whole.  Kaepernick was let go from the 49ers.  And immediately, people started to call for the NFL to be boycotted.  Could the controversy surrounding him have had something to do with his being let go?  Yes.  But I guarantee you that if Kaepernick were winning games and leading his team to the play offs consistently, he would still be a professional quarterback.

You’ll notice I said the exact same thing Kaepernick and Tebow.  While they were controversial in their own ways, they weren’t playing at levels that justified having them on teams.  If they were, they would still have jobs.  It’s as simple as that.

Yet, people were calling for the NFL to be boycotted this fall because Kaepernick lost his job.  Sorry, but if you aren’t good at your job, you will lose it.  That applies to sports just as much as the rest of life.

This is when those defending Kaepernick cited the First Amendment and his freedom of speech.  He absolutely does have freedom of speech, but let’s look at the First Amendment again.  “Congress shall make no law….”  It says nothing about a private company.  And it says nothing about a job when you aren’t very good at your job.

Of course, freedom of speech issues seem to be everywhere these days.  People are defending it or trying to take it away from others.  Yes, riots against a speaker are trying to take away someone’s freedom of speech.  You can disagree, but they still have the freedom to speak even if you disagree with them.

So I do support his right to speak, and he has a platform to speak.  I happen to disagree with what he is saying.  Remember, this started because of his support for the Black Lives Matter movement.  The statistics don’t back up the movement.  Not to say that the perception doesn’t mean anything, but when we look at facts, this movement started from the news media blowing something out of proportion and then fed into perceptions.  Instead of trying to get to solutions, we started having protests.

But Kaepernick still has the right to speak up on this whether I disagree with him or not.

I am bothered by the means he chose to do so, however.  As an American, the flag and the National Anthem mean something to me.  I try to show them respect, although I probably fail at times.  The flag stands for Kaepernick’s right to speak his mind on any topic he wants, for one thing.  And it is clear in our society that we get that flags stand for something.  Over the summer, we’ve had how many discussion on what the Confederate flag stands for and what statues stand for.  Those who want statues taken down say that his taking a knee isn’t a huge insult and those who defend the statues are the most offended.

My feelings on the flag and the anthem were solidified back in the 90’s by Adventures in Odyssey.  For those not familiar with it, this is a radio drama done by Focus on the Family, so it is conservative in bent for sure.  They invented some ways for the kids in modern time to go back and experience history, both Biblical and American.  (They were imagination enhancing computer programs, but they were really just plot devises.)  This particular episode sent two kids back to the battle during the War of 1812 when Francis Scott Key wrote “The Star Spangled Banner.”  They are by his side during the long night when the British are shelling the fort, and they watch for the flag to still be flying, meaning that the fort has not surrendered to the British.  It really showed me just how powerful a symbol the flag is.

Last year, one of the highlights of my day as a tourist in Washington DC was seeing the flag that inspired the song in the Smithsonian.  Thinking again about the story and where the American flag has flown over the years moved me to tears.

So, while I support Kaepernick’s right to speak his mind, I was off put by his actions.  And, frankly, I am a little surprised that the NFL didn’t step in last year.  After all, they threatened to fine players on the Dallas Cowboys who wanted to honor Dallas police officers who had been shot in the line of duty by a sniper.  And they refused to let players honor the victims of 9/11 on Sunday, September 11, 2016.  So why they couldn’t have told Kaepernick to find another way to make his point is beyond me.  And if you are upsetting the people you are trying to reach with your message, maybe you should find another way to speak your mind that will help build a bridge.

Flash forward to this weekend.  I missed what started the entire controversy this particular weekend, but I certainly heard about Trump’s tweet calling for the NFL to fire any player who refused to stand for the anthem.  Now, while I find kneeling for the anthem to be disrespectful, let’s go back and look at how the First Amendment begins again.  “Congress shall make no law….”  Okay, if we want to split hairs, Trump is the President and wasn’t making a law.  But the meaning of the First Amendment is clear, and Trump overstepped.  Period.  End of discussion.

So, honestly, I was left feeling unsettled this weekend.  I find the practice of kneeling disrespectful since it is our country’s tradition to stand at attention.  (Ironically, at other times kneeling show great respect, like kneeling before a king.)  The way the practice has been growing over the last few weeks in other sports and even in kids’ leagues is bothering me.  Yet, I can understand why players felt compelled to do it this weekend to stand up to Trump.

Of course, then there’s the Steeler’s player, a former Army Ranger, who did stand and was made to feel so foolish that he apologized today for letting his team down.  He shouldn’t have had to do that.  It was his choice, and he should have been allowed to make it.  And to answer another comment I saw, the people in the stands booing the players that were kneeling wasn’t racist.  It was their free speech back to the players showing their free speech.  It’s not perfect by any means, but it is part of living in a free society.

But this entire weekend has saddened me yet again.  I saw so many knee jerk responses with very little time for anyone to think things through.  I’ve probably gone overboard with this post (which is currently just over 1500 words), but there is a lot of complexity and hypocrisy on both sides.

I’m also thinking about an observation my brother made in his sermon this Sunday about how easy it is to get people to protest things today, but how hard it is to get people to actually do something productive to make a difference.  I honestly feel like this entire issue, which has been building for the last year, is the perfect example.  Nothing has truly come of this but bad feelings and calls for boycotts (which we do at the drop of a hat).

And lost in all of this is any effort to try to see the other side or try to get along.  Everyone knows they are right, and posts things that only inflame those they disagree with while reinforcing the belief on their side that they are right.  If we want to find a way to get along again as a country, we need to stop talking in memes and think.  Listen to each other.  Think about this story in the context of other stories that have happened in the last year.  5 years.  10 years.  No we can’t solve everything in one day, but at this point, I don’t think that the majority of the country is even trying.

And that saddens me most of all.

As does the fact that something that could be used to bring us together and help us relax and forget about politics for a while is now a political football.

Friday, September 15, 2017

More Bowling

Bowling keeps happening every Tuesday night.  I’m enjoying it, but it sure isn’t going my or my team’s way.

We are currently in last place.  We just can’t seem to win, or if we are in the lead, we can’t hold on to it.  This last week’s third game was a great example where we lost our lead in the ninth frame.

And I am lucky to get more than one strike a game right now.  My high game the last three weeks has been a 161, but other than that, I am usually in the 120 range.  A few games, I’ve been lucky to hit 100.

I’ve noticed this before.  The more I bowl, the less well I actually do.  You’d think it would be the opposite since I’m practicing, but it’s not.  I’m not sure what it is.  I feel like I am trying too hard, and that is making me do worse.  I’m stiff instead of being lose and relaxed, as I am when I am not trying to any expectations.  But who knows if that is the case or not.


I do know that I am completely enjoying my bowl.  It really fits my hand well, something I was truly worried about.  And it’s fun to have my own shoes and my own ball.  It’s a luxury, sure, but it is a ton of fun.